Friday, October 8, 2010

Sometimes the jokes write themselves...

Here's our Oompa Loompa Governor Charlie Crist, throwing out the first pitch at the Tampa Bay Rays playoffs game against the Texas Rangers yesterday...yikes...

Seriously, Tanman, not the best move during a week where you desperately need some positive PR.

A still photograph taken at the game doesn't help redeem his image:
Somewhere there is a female schoolteacher stuck in the 1980s who wants her pants back.  I didn't know they still sold pleated khakis anymore.  Actually, these are so baggy they are almost Hammer Pants.  If he added suspenders, Steve Urkel could sue him for trademark infringement.  

Tell you what, gotta give Charlie credit...he accomplished something I had thought impossible...he makes Obama's mom jeans look tough.

There are so, so many easy ways to make fun of Charlie's sad little attempt at throwing a ball. Here's what popped in my head, please add your own in the comments:
That's the last time we'll ever see Charlie intentionally go to the right.

Throwing like a girl on national TV isn't the best way to dispel those pesky rumors.  Expect lots of newly scheduled appearances with Mrs. Crist next week.

This is just another shameless attempt by Charlie to kiss up to Obama.
The latest group to abandon Charlie's Senate campaign?  Girls' softball teams. 
The latest insult girls' softball teams use to trash-talk each other?  "You throw like Charlie Crist!"
Tomorrow's polls will, inexplicably, show a sudden surge in Charlie's popularity among band geeks and chess club members.
Are we sure that all of the RPOF credit cards were confiscated?  Because it sure looks like Charlie may have gotten into some of his buddy Greer's favorite scotch.
I'm honestly surprised Charlie didn't take a poll before the game to make sure he wouldn't be more popular wearing a Rangers shirt. 
We really should applaud Charlie for managing to throw the ball forward at all.  Based on the past few months, I was under the impression that  the only motions he was able to do were spin, lunge left, or slide downhill.


  1. I didn't realize Crist had an image to redeem. Totally a non-blip on my radar.

  2. That photo sort of makes Charlie look like a baby bird crying for his dinner. Or I guess in this case, crying for votes.

  3. I'm beginning to think you can judge a candidate by how he performs athletically. LOL

    Seriously, it's like real men vs. career politicians! I judge my men that way too. ;-)

  4. A very sad performance by someone who played quarterback for two years at Wake Forest. Most politicians are humble enough to take a few warm-up throws before going on the field. Obviously, Charlie didn't bother.

    Definitely not the guy you want on your company softball team...

  5. It's hard to throw a baseball straight when you have no spine.


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