Democrats in 2008: "No, this will be awesome. Just wait."
Republicans in 2009: "We're not kidding. We hate this bill with the fire of a thousand suns. We hate it so very, very much, to stop it, we are going to elect a Massachusetts dude with a truck who posed nude in Cosmo."
Republicans in 2010: "Ugh. None of us are voting for this hot mess of a bill. Did you not read any of the news about the economy? This bill is a disaster...no, it's a disaster of a disaster. It's the Hindenburg crashing into the Titanic."
|It's gonna be a disaster.|
Americans in 2010: "Umm. Maybe the Democrats shouldn't be in charge of everything. Republicans, you can have the House for awhile."
|I got 99 problems, but a functioning|
health care bill ain't one of 'em.
Republicans in 2012: "Come on now. Seriously. America, Hello! Have you read this bill? It's soooo bad. And they took a bad bill and added a bazillion bad regulations to it. Holy heck, this is gonna be really ugly. We should delay it."
|Obamacare regulations = 1.25 Senators tall.|
Democrats in 2012: "Nah, it's gonna be fine. We just want Sandra Fluke to be able to get birth control pills. Why do you hate women and Big Bird?"
Democrats in November 2012: "Hahaha! Obama got reelected and we still have the Senate! And we won the lawsuit! Obamacare is happening, baby! WE ARE INVINCIBLE!"
Republicans in November 2012: "Oh crap. Well, at least we elected some feisty new Senators and spent the past year screaming at the top of our lungs that not a darn one of us voted for Obamacare. We want to delay this thing."
Republicans in September 2013: "Just wanted to remind everyone that we still don't like this bill. Now we're going to do a series of complicated shutdown-the-government procedural maneuvers that most people won't completely understand but at least we'll get to say a million more times that WE ALL REALLY REALLY REALLY HATE THIS BILL. ALSO NONE OF US VOTED FOR IT. We think we should delay it."
Democrats in September 2013: "Sorry, what was that? We were busy doing a victory dance and totes weren't listening. Whatevs. Healthcare.gov is launching soon, and it's gonna be so cool."
WWII veterans trying to visit their open air memorial in October 2013: "We invaded Normandy. Metal barricades aren't going to stop us. But seriously, can y'all get it together?"
Democrats in October 2013: "Yay! The Obamacare website is launching! Yay! Oh...wait..."
Republicans in October 2013: "Wow, y'all really botched this. If Obamacare is the Hindenburg crashing into the Titanic, this website is the Hindenburg crashing into the Titanic at Chernobyl. Also, just wanted to remind everyone that none of us voted for this bill. And what do you think about delaying?"
|That website, wow. Great job on that website for that|
bill that none of the Republicans voted for, you guys!
Americans in October 2013: "Ummm, Mr. President? What happened to 'if you like your plan, you can keep your plan?' And this website is...[CENSORED]. I mean, it's a really [CENSORED] piece of [CENSORED] [CENSORED]! [CENSORED]!!!"
Democrats in November 2013: "[CENSORED]. Maybe we should delay?"
Republicans in November 2013: "LOL."
Follow me on Twitter at @rumpfshaker